The ABCs of B-Movie Bullsh*t -- F is for Freaks

F

is for Freaks 

When we hear the word “freak” our minds automatically leap to the deformed human oddities presented for our twisted amusement in carnival tent shows, but the true essence of the word is that of someone uniquely special who stands out from the rest of mainstream society. By this definition, “freak” not only refers to the kinds of characters most often found and celebrated in B-Movies, but also the audience members most likely to reject traditional Hollywood entertainment in favour of the less popular, lower budgeted alternatives.

In mainstream films, protagonists are carefully crafted to be as universally likable and relatable as possible. They’re just like us only better and much more attractive. They represent the person we want to see in our mirrors. B-Movie protagonists, on the other hand, are much more likely to be the people we actually see in our mirrors. They are outsiders. They have flaws.

They are freaks.

Sometimes this is a deliberate choice on the part of the filmmakers; sometimes it’s the accidental result of having to cast a cheap, but otherwise talented actor who isn’t handsome enough to make the A-list. It doesn’t matter. The main benefit of making genre, niche films is that you can afford to not please everyone—your investment isn’t big enough to demand that you whitewash reality in order to please the greatest number of people.

And this is a major reason why B-Movie buffs are attracted to these often flawed films. In most cases they are freaks themselves and more closely identify with flawed heroes than the Golden Gods Hollywood would prefer we worship and admire.

F

is for Freaks

and

Freaks

are

Fabulous

The ABCs of B-Movie Bullsh*t -- E is for Exploitation

E

is for Exploitation

When most people hear the term “exploitation movie” they tend to imagine kidnapped runaways forced to perform sexual acts against their will by sweaty goateed pornographers. The real meaning of the term, though, is much more benign and seldom, if ever, involves actual slavery.

When it was originally conceived, the term simply referred to any low budget movie that exploited a specific gimmick in order to convince theatergoers to buy a ticket. The nature of the gimmick could literally be anything—a bizarre concept, the promise of risqué nudity, the acting debut of a non-acting celebrity, the pretense of educational content in order to disguise taboo subject matter, extreme violence, a plot ripped straight from today’s headlines, weird promotional campaigns that had nothing to do with the film itself, etc.

The one common factor that united these films was that they were specifically made for one reason: To earn as much money as possible. Some potential exploitation films, though, have been able to transcend their origins and become art, which disqualifies them from earning the label. For this reason two similar films from the same genre might not both qualify as exploitation movies, despite their apparent similarities. The best example of this being Sean Cunningham’s Friday the 13^th and John Carpenter’s Halloween. Though both films were made quickly, cheaply, and in pursuit of a quick buck, Carpenter’s ambition is immediately apparent from the first shot. On the other hand, Cunningham’s indifference is just as obvious. Made for the same reason and under the same circumstances, only Friday the 13^th qualifies as exploitation. Halloween is art.

That’s not to say that an exploitation movie is therefore automatically without merit. So long as it doesn’t make its audience feel like it was ripped off or suckered in by an unmet promise, it can be considered a success. Every exploitation film makes a promise. The good ones deliver on that promise and the bad ones don’t.

As frequently noted by exploitation movie legend Roger Corman, exploitation films are no longer the sole domain of low-budget filmmakers. By the standards described above, many major Hollywood blockbusters easily qualify as exploitation movies.

E

is for Exploitation

and

Exploitation

is

Excellent

The ABCs of B-Movie Bullsh*t -- D is for Drive-In

D

is for Drive-In

During the height of their popularity drive-ins become synonymous with B-Movies in the minds of many filmgoers. This was not originally the case, as many drive-ins did show first run prestige studio pictures when they first started, but stopped when they discovered they could sell just as many tickets for the much cheaper to rent films made available by smalltime regional distributors.

The fact was that for most people the film itself was secondary to the whole drive-in experience. With often-inferior sound and projection, the film mattered less than the combination of communal ritual and the privacy afforded by your vehicle. An excuse to get out of the house, hang-out and perhaps get lucky with your date, it really didn’t matter what was playing, so long as it offered some action, sex and an occasional laugh or scare.

As a result “drive-in” and “B-Movie” grew to mean the same thing. If you wanted to see the latest major studio blockbuster, you went to a “hard top” theater. If you wanted to see the latest Roger Corman movie you went to the drive-in.

Eventually, though, the drive-in habit began to wane. The privacy that made the ritual so appealing was made unnecessary with the popularity of the VCR and people found other places to hang out. Many drive-ins tried to fight their own obsolescence by once again showing major studio films (the first memory I can put a date on occurred at the Twin Drive-in. There I watched Star Wars in the back of the Dombrosky's wood panelled station wagon during the film's 1978 summer re-release. I was 2 and ½ years old), but by then it was too late.

Today the association between drive-ins and B-Movies remains, largely due to the efforts of enthusiasts such as John Bloom (aka Joe-Bob Briggs) who have worked hard to keep the memory of the drive-in experience alive.

D

is for Drive-Ins

and

Drive-Ins

were

Dazzling

The ABCs of B-Movie Bullsh*t -- C is for Canuxploitation

C

is for Canuxploitation

Popularized by Toronto film reviewer, Paul Corupe, the term "Canuxploitation" can be used to reference any Canadian made exploitation film, but is traditionally associated with a specific period in the history of Canadian film in which the federal government offered tax incentives to anyone who invested in a film production as a way to spur the the country's movie industry. Though the plan proved successful in increasing production, the legislators responsible for the initiative failed to take into account that the kind of investor most likely to take advantage of it would also be inclined to invest only in those productions capable of turning a profit. As a result the arthouse was ignored in favour of the grindhouse.

C-List American actors were shipped across the border to star in low-budget versions of traditional Hollywood genre fare. Very few of these films acknowledged their Canadian roots and were set in generic American cities. This allowed them to more easily play in American cinemas, which enabled efforts such as Meatballs and Porky's to quickly become the most successful Canadian films up to that time. That said, a specifically Canadian aesthetic did manage to transcend Canuxploitation's deliberately generic packaging. Canadian genre films of the period were noted for frequently having a bleak quality that stood out amongst their American counterparts. They also often featured more subdued colour palates that made them stand out visually.

Eventually the government ended the tax shelter program, but Canadian filmmakers benefited from "runaway" Hollywood productions that moved up north to take advantage of the then-favourable exchange rate and lower labour costs. While some of these films can be considered Canuxploitation, many are virtually impossible to distinguish from traditional Hollywood product and are instead thought of as American productions made in a foreign location.

C

is for Canuxploitation

and

Canuxploitation

is

Cool

The ABCs of B-Movie Bullsh*t -- B is for Blaxploitation

B

is for Blaxploitation

In 1971 Hollywood made a shocking discovery--black people went to the movies too. The two films that allowed them to reach this conclusion were Shaft and Sweet Sweetback's Baadasssss Song. The first was a studio picture, the second was made independently and both would have a tremendous impact on the entire decade. It turned out that "urban" audiences were desperate to see images of themselves onscreen and went to the movies more often than their less-"urban" contemporaries. The result was a genre unto itself given the controversial name of Blaxploitation. Though most often associated with low-budget action films, Blaxploitation encompassed virtually every known genre, including horror, westerns, musicals, melodrama, romance, and comedy.

Blaxploitation faced criticism both as an overall concept and for its content. Some of those who participated in the making of the films bristled at the notion that they and their audience were some how being "exploited". They argued that for the first time black actors had the chance to play leading roles in mainstream films and black audiences now had characters they could identify with. How was that exploitation? The answer to this came from (mostly white liberal) critics who argued that Blaxploitation films placed too much of an emphasis on negative cultural stereotypes and featured many films made by white writers and directors in which the black protagonists were pimps, hookers, drug dealers, addicts, thieves, con men and other kinds of anti-heroes that helped perpetuate urban criminality rather than serve as an uplifting respite from it.

As is often the cases in these situations, both points of view were entirely valid. These films did allow many talented black actors to play roles they had never played before and never would again, but too often these roles did require them to enact a white scenarist's skewed view of a culture they obviously didn't understand.

Today, Blaxploitation is fondly remembered more for its dated fashion and  slang than the actual quality of the film's themselves. Parodies of the genre, such as the hilarious Black Dynamite, are invariably more affectionate than biting. And though the genre petered out at the beginning of the 80s, largely due to the rise of suburban multiplexes and a general dissatisfaction with the overall quality of the films, its influence remains today and can be seen in any urban action film starring the latest rapper looking to expand upon his record career.

B

is for Blaxploitation

and

Blaxploitation

was

Baadasssss

The ABCs of B-Movie Bullsh*t -- A is for A.I.P.

A

is for A.I.P.

Samuel Z. Arkoff and James H. Nicholson did not believe movies were art. They had no reverence for relevance. They were businessmen, pure and simple. Their methodology was ingenious. Come up with an insanely catchy tile (I Was a Teenage Werewolf). Hire a talented artist to create a poster based on that title. Show the poster to film buyers. Rake in the cash, and then hire people to actually make the movie. As backwards as this may sound, there was no arguing with their success. During a time when the studios were fighting a losing battle against television, A.I.P. understood that the real money was in the kids who couldn't stand being cooped up inside with their parents, so they made movies for drive-ins that offered up all of the scares, skin and laffs kids craved.

For star power they hired older actors who the studios no longer wanted. The result was big names for budget prices. They formed a deal with a plucky young go-getter named Roger Corman, and as a result grandfathered the 70s movie revolution. They made good movies (Dr. Goldfoot and the Bikini Machines). They made bad movies (Dr. Goldfoot and the Girl Bombs). They even ventured out and made some expensive movies (Meteor), but in the end the quality meant less than the quantity--A.I.P. made a lot movies and ended up defining B-Movie cinema as we still know it.

A

is for A.I.P.

and

A.I.P.

was

Awesome

B-Movie Bullsh*t Random List O'Stuff Part 1: Thematically Sound

Here are five B-Movie theme songs that came to mind when I set out to make a list of great B-Movie theme songs.

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B-MOVIE BULLSH*T - Part Eight "Welcome to The Monster Club"

Extremely dated. Extremely entertaining.

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B-MOVIE BULLSH*T - Part Seven "Rip 'Em!"

This movie is truly terrible, but I sympathize.

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B-MOVIE BULLSH*T - Part Six "I Wouldn't Want to Change THAT Diaper"

Here I take a look at an exploitation film that isn't quite as exploitative as it might seem.

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